American Horror Story: Check In Any Time You Like

via FX

via FX

New cast members for Season 5 of American Horror Story: Hotel have been announced. Showrunner Ryan Murphy has confirmed that Wes Bentley the magical, double-faced Mordrake from Season 4, Chloe Sevigny (nymphomaniac-cum-legless Shelley from Season 2), and Sarah Paulson, the consummate heroine with flawless hair, will be returning this year. Murphy also announced that Lady Gaga and the handsome Matt Bomer will be season regulars. And Entertainment Weekly confirmed Emmy Award nominee Angela Bassett is set to return.

Let’s be honest, it could just be the Ms. Bassett show and most people would be happy.

So aside from a cast of ridiculously gorgeous people, what else can we expect from Season 5?The theme is said to have been inspired by a musical comedy from 1935 titled Top Hat, which was set in a hotel. Aside from that, we don’t know much else, which has prompted fan theories. One of these postulates that the hotel might be similar to one of the more famous haunted hotels in America, namely, The Stanley.

This is the Stanley Hotel sans Jack Nicholson.

This is the Stanley Hotel sans Jack Nicholson. via Wikimedia.

The Stanley was the inspiration behind The Shining because it scared the hell out of Stephen King. The twins in the first season of AHS appear to be an allusion to The Shining and might signal the Stanley as inspiration. While the hotel’s proprietors claim there aren’t any sinister ghosts on the premises that probably won’t stop Murphy from creating a ghostly serial killer/pederast with mommy issues who impregnates a werewolf maid with the spawn of an anglerfish. Think about it.

But if phantasmal fish aren’t your thing, don’t fret. Another fan theory is that the hotel will be inspired by The Garden of Allah, which was a real hotel in Hollywood that was frequented by the likes of Ronald Reagan, Groucho Marx and Eartha Kitt. It was notorious for its debaucheries, simmering feuds and tons of drugs. Stanley in Freakshow mentions the hotel (he should have moved there if he wanted to keep his limbs). It was also the title of a movie starring Marlene Dietrich, who was the inspiration for the strong-willed Elsa Mars in Freakshow.

But the connections go on. Don Henley has a song titled The Garden of Allah, which is a fable story about the Devil visiting the titular hotel and finding out that humans have perfected evil and his influence is no longer necessary. This sounds uncannily like the bohemian lifestyles The Garden of Allah embraced and seemingly encouraged. The song was penned in 1995 and also references the OJ Simpson murder case, which is ironic considering Murphy’s newest project is the American Crime Story television series. The theme for the premiere? The OJ Simpson case, of course. Begin side bar – Um, what’s with Don Henley and hotels? – End side bar.

Garden of Allah was also a mid-20th century gay cabaret hosted in the basement of Seattle’s Pioneer Square hotel. Another hotel connection. Acts were primarily female impersonators, so let’s hope that means Evan Peters in fishnets this season. We’ll give those two thumbs up!

Whatever happens, one can be certain there will be a pretty high creep factor. Let’s just hope it doesn’t include caterwauling songs.

Leave a comment

Texas Loses Brains

It's a chimp brain, yes. That's probably who was operating the lab. Via Wikimedia Commons


Via Wikimedia Commons

In recent news, The University of Texas in Austin has lost 100 brains. That was half of the University’s collection and it has been pawned off as some kids desiring coffee table art. While identifying information was removed from the specimens in order to protect confidentiality, a co-curator of the collection believes that Charles Whitman’s brain was part of the stolen organs, however other reports dispute the claim.

Who is Charles Whitman? Until the Virginia Tech campus shooting, Whitman was responsible for the deadliest campus shooting in U.S. history, when he took to the 307-foot tower and started sniping students. According to another professor and co-curator, students have been swiping brains for years. He didn’t mention if they ever get returned.

In a follow up statement by the University, they stated that the brains may have been thrown away. Nonetheless, they’re still checking into a report that the brains might be on loan to other universities and institutions. Let’s just read that to mean they have no idea where the 100 brains are. Occam’s Razor says its zombies.

Leave a comment